Conspiracy theory behind remote control devices

Conspiracy theory behind remote control devices


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A platter full of remotes for the taking, but which one?

It seems these days, everyone has a conspiracy theory.  I have one too.  I believe that remote control devices only work for a very limited number of people so that program viewing and selection is controlled in households by a secret society sort of on the same line as the New World Order (NWO).  While NWO theory postulates that secretive power elite with a globalist agenda is conspiring to rule the world and replace our sovereign nation-states, remote control theory (RCT) is suggesting that only gamers and male partners have the secret elite power to select the TV programs we view in most American homes.  Why else is turning on the TV so hard?

If you go to someone’s house (in my case, my own home) and pick up the TV remote control, chances are very high; you won’t know how it works.  So why, when both technology and television programming is improving, are our interfaces so counterintuitive?  The answer is RCT.  Why else can I not figure out how to turn on my own TV? I have to call for help five out of ten times.  RM has given me step by step instructions in a less than understanding tone.  Each time the explanation seems different from the first.  I am sure he is a member of RCT with the goal to make everyone suffer through reruns of Two and A Half Men and How It’s Made.  Sometimes I can get it to work just fine.  Other times, I get a blue screen or some weird message flashes across the screen to press ESCAPE taking me back to a never-ending loop of clicking with no success.  It is harder to work a remote control than write a grant for a million dollars.

We have seven clickers lined up under the flat screen TV.  Each one has its own mission in life…to frustrate me to tears.  I only know how to turn on the TV and get to HGTV and Cooking Channels.  I have watched all the episodes of Property Brothers twice, because I love them, but also because it is the only channel I can navigate to on the big TV.

And don’t tell me to go buy a universal remote control because we tried that too. The lowly infrared beam still needs to interface with the TV, the cable box, the sound system, etc. and that comes with its own set of limitations and problems.  So while I am waiting for the modernization of the universal remote and for the RCT to run its course and get to the end game of nothing on TV but shows that have CSI in the title. I find tremendous pleasure and control by watching Netflix on my IPad.

Click on but someone else is holding the string.

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